Broke My Heart

Hubby is traveling. Some of you have seen him more recently than the three left on the farm. Lucky you. He called today as I was putting Son1 down for a nap. My mom said he called the house phone and my cell, neither of which I answer when I am crazy with kids. Mom insisted on letting me know who it was, because, after all, she loves the fact that Hubby calls specifically to speak to Son1 pretty close to coming home from preschool. I thought the better of it right before I read a naptime story and he said his prayer and grabbed my cell Mom had left for me. I hit SEND.

"Daddy?!!?"

"Hi Son 1. I heard you got a choo choo." (YES that is ANOTHER story of how I reserved the special Christmas choo choos from Wal Mart a week ago.)
"Yeah, my Santa choo choo. Daddy, you come to my house?"
"No, I am not coming home today. You have to wake up seven more times and then I will be home."

And something happened that has yet to happen. Son1 broke down in heaving and crying in absolute sadness with some HUGE crocodile tears. I mean some real brokenheartedness. I knew this day would come because I have already experienced Son1's disappointment when Daddy is gone...some asking if he could save something for Daddy, if he could show something to Daddy, refusing to come to the phone to talk to Daddy, pouting when he knows I tell him Daddy is going on the plane without him, asking where Daddy went, hoping Daddy is home when we get back from shopping, and a whole slew of other times.

I got back on the phone. This was not the conversation Hubby was expecting to have with his son. I know that he doesn't like to be away, most of the time, anyway.
"Oh, that broke his heart. I am so sorry," I said.

Over and over, Son1 cried, "Broke my heart! Broke my heart!" Sigh....I didn't mean to have him repeat those words. I have never heard him use those words before. He knows love and that a heart loves, and it feels good. Toys get broken...so understanding "broke my heart" didn't take too much effort. And that really broke my heart.

Don't be such a chicken!

I have waited to post this until I was sure I wasn't going to die or be immediately hospitalized.

Last week my mom and I went grocery shopping at Costco. I love their prepared meals, the ones with the clear plastic dome lids that snap to the black bottoms...do you know what I am talking about? They are usually in the deli section where they have the tortilla wraps. They have a new chicken florentine, well, new to our Costco, anyway. For $9.03 I purchased three lovely butterflied breasts stuffed with that good florentine stuff inside. I planned to make them one of the nights I had evening commitments, for a fast dinner.

By the time we got home it was dark and I had two sleepy kids to put to bed. Mom and I both unpacked the car. The next morning, I started to load some tea stuff for church in the back of my van when I noticed...oh no....I left the chicken florentine in the car over night!! SIGH....I walked back and told my mom defeatedly that we should throw them away, shouldn't we?!? And somehow, I just really wanted her to say they could be salvaged. The lines at Costco were horrendous and I couldn't stomach standing in the lines again with 2 sick kids. But if any of you think of me as a germaphobe, my mom is much worse. She is the lady that took a can of Lysol with her to the beach and would tell us not to touch anything in the bathrooms before she sprayed it all down. We weren't even allowed to touch anything after that, anyway. She brought her own toilet paper, too. My mom is such a germaphobe she won't even share a drink with her own kids. When we were little she and my dad told us they would buy us a drink rather than share one with us. I am not sure what they were more afraid of, backwash or kiddie germs. Who would have thought a little salmonela wouldn't bother her???

The thought crossed my mind that being hospitalized or dying wasn't worth $9.03. But I completely ignored it. My mom and I both agreed that if we cooked the chicken really well to an internal teperature of 170 degrees it would be fine for 55 minutes. What got into us germaphobes, I have no idea. And just to check, we called Hubby. He has his own Jack the Germ issues...and he was skeptical, but thought that quite possibly our chicken might be fine.

We cooked the chicken. When it came out of the oven, I even gave it a good zap in the microwave for some insurance. Five days later, we are still standing.

Suckered by Santa

Hubby and I grew up believing in Santa, and have lived to tell about it. We both grew up in Christian homes, and don't feel it caused a spiritual demise. However, as of now, we haven't taught Son1 about Santa. Clearly, he knows the man in the red suit. He is in most stores. But that is the extent of it. We see him as pretend and make believe. And Son1 makes believe a lot of other stuff, anyway. We don't teach him Santa is real. We won't say that if he has been good Santa will bring him toys. We won't tell him that Santa knows whether he has been naughty or nice. Omniscience, omnipresence, and omnipotence is reserved for God.

That being said...



I saw these little wind up toys at Wal Mart. I bought just one helicopter and and plane to start for $2.00 each. Son1 went nuts over these things. They provided hours upon hours of entertainment for a couple of days. Then I started wondering why I didn't pick up the snow mobile and choo choo train. So my mom and I scoured two Wal Marts, looked inbetween nooks and crannies and under shelves to find random wind ups. Some will go to friends at preschool. I WISH I would have gotten the choo choo train wind ups. But they are sold out. The smoke stack goes up and down. All of the wind ups turn in different directions, too. NOW...if anyone sees choo choos like these at their Wal Mart...can you PLEASE buy me two choo choos, and we can settle up later?

Fruit on the Farm

This is an exotic fruit commonly called Star Fruit or Five Finger. It is grown all over the world, primarily in Asia. In the US it grows in Hawaii and in Florida. These were given to us from Son1's preschool aide at the Thanksgiving banquet. Star fruits are crunchy, and have a slightly tart, acidic, sweet taste, like pears, apples, and sometimes grapes. The fruits are a good source of vitamin C. Its seeds are small and brown. They have a tough outer skin and a tangy white inside.

When they are cut into their five sections they look like five fingers.

When they are cut across they make a star shape. These are often in exotic salads at the fancy shmancy restaurants. When we take a salad to someone's house we put these in there, too. The only time we have gotten Star Fruit has been as gifts from people's yards. You can buy them, but they are a little expensive and not always available.

Another one of our banana trees is flowering. See the banana buds poking out?

It's also a papaya week. We have gotten 2 ripe papayas this week. We have three or four trees. This one is flowering at the top, too.

So that's what she had in her suitcase...

My mom came into town on Friday. I arrived at the airport early with my two kiddos in tow. I wasn't sure if I should park or circle around....so I called my sis to see if Mom would require help. Nooo her plan is to get a smart carte, came the response. And don't be mad at her...but she brought two suitcases full of gifts and not so many clothes. Ahhh a definite improvement. She usually comes loaded down with gifts and too many clothes.



Before she left CA she asked if we needed anything. Hubby piped up. We don't need anything, and please no more cookie jars...because somehow she always brings a cookie jar.

According to her, and to these guys, this thing crested on my table doesn't count since it isn't ceramic, even if it does have 150 gingerbread men frosted with white chocolate inside.

A Preschool Thanksgiving

Son1 had a Thanksgiving luncheon at preschool. First we created a Thanksgiving windsock with Son1 for craft time. Then each family placed a feather on this large turkey with their thanksgivings. Ohhh Hubby volunteered to fill out our feather with a twinkle in his eye, like he was going to take an evangelical opportunity. I suggested um, not now. I love Jesus, I do. I invited his teachers to our church for a Christmas outreach event. I am most comfortable, and often do share my faith in smaller settings. I just didn't want the plan of salvation on a turkey feather at that moment. Shoot me, save the turkey, true confessions of a born again that is sometimes reluctant to share Jesus. My husband generally doesn't have that issue. It must be very freeing and I ought to take some lessons. I took one look at that yellow feather, and I thought I recognized the handwriting. "I thank God for...His Son, Jesus Christ, my family, and His many Blessings!...." I stopped reading, went up to Hubby, and said I wish he wouldn't have written that. He gave me a perplexed look. Stomach turn. I went back to finish reading the rest of the yellow feather that thanked the families....and on and on.....the teacher had written the feather! Boy I was embarrassed of myself for my shyness and proud of her all at the same time. Lesson learned. Then I looked for very similar writing on the blue feather that thanks God for our preschool teachers, and our family, and la la la that Hubby wrote.

Before we ate, his preschool teacher asked for a moment of silence where we remembered our forefathers and why they came to this country (uh hem, religious freedom that she all but mentioned), asked us to bow our heads, and then concluded us with AMEN. That is otherwise known as a prayer to me. And I'm so cool with that, particularly outside of a Christian environment. There is no way I would have gotten away with doing the same, teaching in conservative VA, where there is a daily moment of silence in the public schools.

All of the families participated in creating a knock down luncheon buffet. There was local food, fruit, pizza, hot dogs, salads, breads, desserts...and a ton of other stuff I can't remember.

This is our family photo with Roaring Lion. That is his Natvie American name for the Thanksgiving play.

A Little People Thanksgiving

Yup. I got the set available only online. He can totally reinact the whole thing...minus the religious freedom part of it. Sigh...maybe when he is four. Now you know that will require purchasing the Little People Mayflower set....

Hubby goes on a mosquito fest...er, field trip!

I thought it would be cool for Hubby to chaperone Son1's field trip to the Lyons Arboretum. So I signed him up. The arboretum is a botanical garden that specializes in woody plants and is part of the University of Hawai'i. It is one of the few accessible rain forests on this island, is about 200 acres large, and averages 165 inches of rain a year. Hubby called it a mosquito fest. It was hot, muddy, and buggy. He was slightly annoyed when he got home. The coolest things he saw:

1. Leaf skeleton- Bugs eat the entire leaf and just leave a skeleton of the leaf when they are done.
2. Popping leaf pod-The leaves pop and seeds go everywhere.
3. Planting a sunflower with Son1.


Hubby was a good chaperone, though. The preschool teacher even wrote me a note and sent a huge mahalo my way for all of Hubby's help. Oh, he was so nice. He even took some pumpkin cookies I made, and shared them with the teachers.

Backyard Bananas

Son2 tried his first fruit last night, straight from our backyard. Mmmmm he loves apple bananas. Mmmm down the hatch they went. I said "mmmm!" and he said it back!

Still in China

Bellenbaum Family,

Ok, folks. Quit worrying. I got Proof of Life for everyone that A. is fine and still in China:

"Let Dodo know that I'm doing great. I really like living in China. Shanghai is amazing. I've been doing a ton of traveling. So far, I've been to Suzhou, Hangzhou, Yangshuo, Guilin, Dalian, Huangshan, Lushan and of course everywhere in Shanghai. I'm hoping to finish my travel plans with Beijing in the next few weeks. Sorry I haven't written..."

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Why paddle?

Hubby and some of the guys surfed today. Swells were three to five feet on the South shore. Why paddle? They each paid $5 to get out past the wave breaks by boat. They drop off where you request and come get you at your specified time. Drop off 1:30, pick up 3:15. Here is the kicker. Hubby rode in a wave so far and so long that he really had to work to get back out to the guys, no boat this time. He ditched riding his board back out to the guys when the wave sets got somewhat high and the board became a hindrance, and he swam through the waves. Since he was purposely leashed, he came home with a slight chest bruise. Still he had a great time with the guys.His surf board might as well be made out of gold. I probably could buy a year's worth of diapers with this thing.

It was a silver day

I bought two of these this morning!

This morning I spent $11 total at yard sales on the following, all in excellent condition:

Silver pitcher

Shabby chic pitcher

Tea ball-new in package

4 children's books

Silver pedestal dish

Small ceramic dish

4 placemats with 4 napkins

2 vintage silver plated carafes like the one pictured

AND Hubby spent $15 for 90 lbs of weights for his weight bench.

Competitive EVEN at the church ornament exchange!

Last night I flounced my competitive spirit at the church ornament exchange. I'll tell ya all about it, but let's start with a little round of Happy Birthday.


This is my friend, J. I met her 2 years ago at the ornament exchange. It was her bday yesterday. Applause, applause. This was the first time she left her baby born early last month with a pumped bottle with dad. Doesn't she look great? Anyway...she is so not a fru fru. She is a girly girl, oh yes, that she is. But a fru fru she is NOT. So yes, a group of us surprised her with a fru fru tiara and the back side of that balloon has a fru fru island girl on it, and a lei, and a chocolate cake with strawberry mousse filling. I called her earlier, and she was rather short, but I said,

"Really quick. ABC wants me to pick up a cake for tonight...white, choc., or carrot?"

"Ohhh, ALWAYS CHOCOLATE."

"Strawberry or chocolate mousse filling?"

"Strawberry!"

Now wasn't she helpful and cooperative? Happy birthday, J.! When we met 2 years ago at the ornament exchange she said watching me was like watching a movie. What a gracious compliment! HA! Now do you think I was a little competitive back then?

I bought 2 ornaments an hour before the sacred exchange. We play that you go in numerical order, based on the number you draw out of a basket. You either pick a gift from the pile and open it, or you steal one out of someone's lap that has been opened. Once an ornament lands for the third time in someone's hot little hands it is considered frozen. I had it all figured out this year. I bought two ornaments so that I would have two number positions, and a good chance at getting some cool ornaments. We are about to start, and one lady announces that her three little red bags stuffed with Christmas tree wrapping are considered one ornament. And I whipped around after my ornament radar went off after hearing talk of multiple ornaments. I looked at her coyly, and asked why she just didn't draw three numbers. Oh the look of horror...the gasp, the hand over her heart...

"That wouldn't really be fair would it? I can't take three ornaments!!!"

Now come on. She is asking a Farmer. "Why do you think I brought two ornaments?" I kidded. Oh these mercy hearts...you know what she asked me?

"Did you invite someone who couldn't come?" To which I very honestly and boldly replied, "Noooo. I brought an ornament for me, and one for my Competitive Spirit. That way I get two chances at numbers." A howl came from the rest of the ladies in the room. I assured them my entertainment was free.

The number basket went around and around. The lady who brought the 3 in 1 ornaments drew one number. She refused to take 3. When the basket touched my fingers I had to make a decision. No, I could not abandon a mission. I drew two numbers. More howling from those around. The neatly wrapped ornaments were opened in order and then ABC called number 12. Me! ME! ME! I took my time deciding. "Well, I am not too worried about the person after me. My Competitive Spirit drew number thirteen." Laughter from the group. I went right for the kill. I grabbed the 3 in 1 package. I unwrapped one Hawaiian ornament. Ohhhh. It was a ceramic replica of a Hawaiian quilt square. Hawaiian quilting is an almost lost art form. Think Amish quilting, minus the horses and buggies, aprons and bonnets, and more expensive, with pineapples, turtles, and flowers. So 3 in 1 lady tells me not to bother opening any more iof the 3 in 1 ornaments because they are all the same, just different colors. "HA! These are just like one of the ornaments I brought," I said. More laughter. Why everyone thought was so funny, I have no idea.

My heart got the better of me. I just couldn't bring myself to open another ornament after I scored the 3 in 1 package. So I passed off my number 13 to this little girl.

Wouldn't you know that my 3 quilt squares were stolen! So I drew from the packages on the ground and I got a bag that had not just one ornament in it. No, this one had another 3 ornaments, too. Now people couldn't really figure how I felt about my 3 new ornaments. I wore my ornament poker face. Well, S. was sitting to my left. She had her 4 ornaments that spelled N-O-E-L stolen from her that she stole from someone else. Ugh. So she stole my second set of 3 ornaments.
Two of the ornaments were picture frames. What I didn't say out loud, lest someone steal them from me, was that I was going to put pictures in them from the ornament exchange to cherish forever. But, noooo. S. stole them from me just after J. said she couldn't take the last ornament in the pile because that was her own. Sigh. But I really was ok with that. Let me tell you another thing about J. She likes nice things. So I knew I was going to get a nice ornament because I was pretty sure she bought a nice one. And sure enough, she bought a beautiful Hawaiian ornament with dolphins. It would have been my first choice, really. Well the original 3 in 1 lady also won a Hawaiian ornament with palm trees, similar to my dolphin ornament. Now you know nice ornaments come in really nice boxes, just like these did. 3 in 1 lady starts making a comment about how nice the box is, decorated in a Hawaiian fabric motif, with magnetic doors on the box. So, kiddingly and really just for another laugh, I said, "I'll trade you my box for your ornament." Then she insisted I take the gold and green palm tree ornament. No, no, no, I refused. And then I refused a second time. And a third time. Now this made me feel guilty, particularly when she plopped her box on top of mine. Finally she had me convinced that I have an ornament for each of my two boys. Sigh. Okay. She broke me down. No more laughs. But seriously, I walked away with what my first two choices would have been, anyway.

What's the difference between mommy manipulation and mommy strategy?

I wanted Son1 to take a nap after preschool today. As I was leaving Son1's room, I said to Son2 in my arms, "See, baby? See how Son1 is going to take a nap? You are going to go down for a nap, too, just like Son1. And since you are a baby, you have to sleep in a crib. But when you are a big boy, you are going to take a nap in a big boy bed, just like your brother". And we avoided any struggles for Son1 to take his nap. Same thing with medicine. "See, baby? See how Son1 is able to take big boy medicine? (Tylenol Meltaways) When you are a big boy, you will get to take big boy medicine, too. But right now you are a baby, and right now you have to take baby medicine." You get the drill. The same works for making potty trips, brushing teeth, and eating food. I wonder how much longer I can get away with telling something to Son2 in order to get Son1 to do something before the 2 of them get wise to me?

Beauty is a Billboard Buster

Hawaii is one of 4 states where it is against the law to erect billboards. Can you guess the other 3? Here is a hint...before you google it....the premise being they detract from the beauty of the environment and obstructs views. I'll tell ya after you read the only exceptions in Hawaii below:

(1) Directional and other official signs and notices, which signs and notices shall include, but not be limited to,signs and notices pertaining to natural wonders, scenic and historic attractions as authorized or required by law.
(2) Signs, displays, and devices advertising the sale or lease of the property upon which they are located.
(3) Signs, displays, and devices advertising activities conducted on the property upon which they are located.
(4) Signs lawfully in existence on October 22, 1965, determined by the director to be landmark signs, including signs on farm structures or natural surfaces, of historic or artistic significance the preservation of which would be consistent with the purpose of this section.

The other 3 states are Alaska, Maine, and Vermont.

Goin' (Apple) Bananas

Nearly two years ago we were given these apple banana trees by some of Hubby's co-workers. They are not a cross between an apple and a banana. They are just particularly sweet. They are over 2x as expensive in the store as regular bananas. My neighbors to the right of our house (not pictured) were in our backyard with me a short time after the trees were planted. They asked me if Hubby was sure he knew what he was doing planting these trees. Banana trees multiply quickly. I assured them he knew just what he was doing by planting these trees. My neighbors to the left (that's their house just beyond the bunch of bananas) mentioned once they could see in my kitchen window. HA! Hubby put a stop to that and planted three of the trees on the side of our house, blocking my kitchen window. Our neighbors spoil us, though, even when they could see in our kitchen window, too. This tree grew somewhere between 20 and 30 feet tall.

See that pointy little thing in the foreground? That is called a "keiki sucker." Right before a tree starts to flower, these little keiki suckers sprout. Keiki is the Hawaiian word for child. So the tree births a new little tree shoot before it will give fruit. It can birth lots of these around the stump, but no less than one before flowering. The dead brown leaves around the base are rich in something that helps the tree to grow, so they are not supposed to be trimmed back while the tree is growing.

The fruit has been on the tree for about six months. It is time to pick the fruit when the star tips of the banana fall off the ends and one banana turns yellow. See the one at the top of the bunch? That coily thing that is coming out of the bottom of the bunch used to be the stem to a beautiful flower that bloomed before the fruit arrived.

Each apple banana tree will only give fruit once in it's life. After the fruit has been cut down then the tree must also be cut down on an angle for it to regenerate.
The trunk was far thicker and denser than we imagined. Even with an electric saw we still had to pull it hard and down to get the trunk to fully snap. The problem was that it was naturally leaning over my neighbor's wall already. When Hubby sawed it down the weight of the tree catapulted the majority of the top heavy tree over the wall. Our neighbor came to help.

We ended up with approximately 80 bananas. We gave some to this neighbor. He is a professional skin diver and brings us huge fresh parrot fish amongst others. We shared with our other neighbor as well. We have an open invitation into his back yard for all kinds of fruits and herbs. But this particular day he traded us fresh guava for apple bananas. It is rude in local culture not to share. We are all about some aloha love here.


Son1 was really intrigued by the massive leaves that once towered over our yard now blanketing the ground.

This leaf was chopped before the picture was taken. It used to be larger and more gigantic. Son1 must know this is a "gone native" pose. He is about to give the Hawaiian shaka.

These are the trees we have left on this side of the house. We have more around back. Many of these trees stared out as just keiki suckers.

Family Time

It's been a long couple of weeks. Hubby has been working a crazy amount of hours every week between the day job, his consulting, and the dissertation, so we decided to spend Veteran's Day at home, on the farm. Previously we thought we might travel to an outer island, and decided on some calm, instead.

Son2 progresses with more and more solids. He is eating meats now....of course, not organic. Just completely synthetic.

Nah...the truth is he just had his first green beans, and those were organic. No meats just yet.

We spent one afternoon at the Dole Plantation. The big attraction there is the train. It's not just for tourists, either. Local folks ride it with their kids because kids ride free until they are four. The adults get a kama'aina discount (locals) with our driver's license. We sat in the very first seat behind the engine. This was our first opportunity ever to ride directly behind the engine. Son1 was insistent he sit with Daddy....just him and Daddy...even though I nabbed the front car seat, and they initially sat a few rows back. It took some convincing that the whole family could sit in the first car. All he cared was that he sat next to Daddy, his hero. I had to explain to those around us listening to our little conversation that Daddy has been working some crazy hours for the last few weeks. He has been leaving before sunrise and coming home long after Son1 went to bed. And therefore the need for assurance that Son1 would sit next to Daddy. Now Son1 knows his trains. He was thrilled to see the engine, the connectors for the car to the engine, the gears, and the driver of the Pineapple Express.

Rows and rows of pineapples growing...look closely. They grow on top of the plant. One pokes out to my left below.

And so the day came to a close. Son1 got his wish. Just Daddy and him.