Getting LOST

Hubby suggested I take his car to the LOST set so that I wouldn't have to pull the kiddos' car seats out of my car. He only bought his car a few weeks ago, and I had never driven it. Bad idea to drive this car for the first time in the dark and in a rush. I hopped in the car at 4:45AM. I couldn't find the lights in my driveway, but finally found them on the dash board. A button controls them. Then I tried to depress the emergency foot brake by punching it the way I do in my car. Nope, that just tightened it. Finally I found a lever to the left and below the steering wheel. SIGH. What else? Was I ever going to leave my driveway? It was raining. Don't ask me where I found those windshield wipers but I finally found them somewhere different from where they are in my car. I started down the road and heard a humming sound coming from the vehicle, and I was lacking power. I looked down and I was in D2. GREAT. I had to wait for a traffic light to slip into Drive. Finally I was on the highway, headed toward Honolulu. The directions were to take the cut off (that is what we call an off ramp in Hawaii) and then drive over the canal. It was still really dark, and I couldn't see the canal. It wasn't one of the major canals I was familiar with in town, so I was a little confused. I started to look for my left turn. The street signs don't hang from the big traffic lights like they do in CA. No, they are on street corners tucked back from the road in dark light. The letters aren't reflective, so I pulled into a convenience store and asked some old men standing out front if they knew where this street was. Yeah, about 1.5 miles down the road. I doubled back on the major road, and headed in the right direction. About .5 mile later I realized I had just passed the turn. I doubled back AGAIN, grateful Hubby wasn't riding shotgun, absolutely horrified the way I was whipping round and round on a major road. I finally pulled onto the right street and into a gravel parking lot with lots of semi trucks and white trailers. A man that could have been no smaller than a 4X shirt size shined a flashlight at me and gruffly asked if he could help me. I told him I was here for LOST and he waved me through with a flashlight. I pulled far into the parking lot. I went to pull the keys out of the ignition and they wouldn't budge. Oh no. Why hadn't I taken the trusty minivan that has never failed me? A security guard came over and insisted I pull forward. I couldn't even pull the keys out of the ignition. He thought I just needed to push a button and the key should just pop out. Well, I assumed the same thing, but that didn't work. I let him have a look, and he couldn't figure it out either. I dialed my house and after 2 rings I hung up because I figured out my problem. I was still in Drive and not in Park. It was just after 5:30AM, my call time. I grabbed my book, pump, chair, identification, and extra clothes, and headed toward a large group of people. A groggy Hubby called me. Had I called the house and hung up? I told him never mind. Poor thing, I woke him up for nothing. I stood in a long line with a lot of other folks. Oh, the costume line. Wait a minute, I hadn't even signed in! I jumped out of the long line, checked in under the New Women, was handed my slip for payment, and was told to exchange my slip for a costume. I muddled my way up to the costume director. He handed me a black abaya with the hijab covering for my head. The head covering was detailed and laden with little rhine stone trim. I asked where I could change and he waved me toward a four sided vinyl white tent. I opened the flap, walked in, and saw women changing in the big empty open space. I pulled on the abaya, and my first thought was that this thing was too big, I looked like the Ghost of Christmas to Come from the movie, Scrooge. I could barely get it on it was so long. I am slightly over 61 inches. I slid back into my leather sandals, and came out of the vinyl tent. I extended my arms like an eagle, and paraded out for the costume director. I told him that the abaya was just too big. It was so long it looked like I was wearing a wedding dress train. He pulled my dress abaya together, tied it in the right place, and looked at the obviously low neck line on the scoop neck, and announced, "NO cleavage! Keep the girls inside!" Some folks in line giggled, and he waved me off toward the hair trailer. He recanted as soon as he saw me take a step. My slides were not going to work. No, another costume helper handed me a pair of black closed toe shoes and black Nike athletic socks. What a combo! Ha ha, none of the females on set had brought black socks. So the costume folks were scrounging to grab socks for all of us. No skin was allowed to show, including my feet that couldn't be seen from under the abaya, anyway.

I headed toward the hair trailer. In between trailers I saw Naveen Andrews (plays Sayid) walking in the same direction, parallel to me. I made a turn toward the hair trailer, and met up with some of the other girls ahead of me. We got to talking, and I repeated what the costume director had said about my cleavage. They laughed. Then wouldn't you know NA comes up right behind me as I am sharing and says, "Hullo ladies! Today is a perfect day for a funeral isn't it?" I was totally mortified, as he noticed. He laughed and went up into hair and make up. One by one, the girls ahead of me were called to have their hair done, and have the hijab placed appropriately. Finally, it was my turn. I was totally mortified again. Guess who was sitting in the chair next to me, getting his hair done, cracking jokes? To be continued...