Walking with Abe and Heather

Hiking Diamond Head is the one thing every one tells you to do on Oahu. Except no one tells you to hike it pregnant. But Heather didn't seem too worried. She was pregnant with her second baby, into her second trimester. We stood in the middle of the crater in the parking lot. The early morning sun was blazing hot already. Hubs was saddled with our chunky toddler in a back pack frame. We grabbed water and cameras and climbed to the mouth of the trail.

Climbing the steep trail, Hubs quickly found that the weight of the backpack on the incline was less burdensome if he kept moving. Our little guy wasn't quite a lightweight. So he and Abe kept a-climbing, while Heather and I hiked at our own pace. I could hear Heather's breath quickening as she continued to climb. I kept asking her if she wanted to stop. Most times she said no, but every now and then we would stop for some water. I was a little paranoid because we had already been to the hospital once since they arrived (oh it was necessary and eventful, but it turned out ok). I had no idea what it felt to be pregnant and making the steep climb, but I was right there with her, walking the trail. We were both going to make it to the top, one way or another.We climbed the switchbacks and finally caught the men before the 99 step staircase. Next was the spiral staircase, and a few more steps. Hubs stayed behind at the summit since the backpack wasn't going to fit. Pregnant Heather, Abe, and I made the low duck out of the the last tunnel and stood 761 feet above sea level. We had made it! We stood at the top of the crater that dominates all of Waikiki, looking 20 miles west to Barber's Point, and 9 miles to Koko Head Crater behind us. Heather was the only pregnant lady we saw. We took some pictures, admired the beauty, and began our descent. We started back down Diamond Head, down the spiral staircase, down the 99 steps, and the other tunnels. At one point, Abe offered to carry our little man. He didn't know exactly how Hubby felt making the ascent, but he had inkling because he had walked with him every step of the way. So he offered to carry little man down the trail.
We started walking with Abe and Heather in 2000. We met them in Northern VA, through an Adult Bible Fellowship. In 2003 some of our friends ran in the Marine Corps Half Marathon at Quantico. Hubs fell behind some of the faster guys in our group. Abe hung back with Hubs until they reached the finish line. He was with him every step of the way.You know how you just click with some couples? The husbands click, and the wives click, and it just works? That's how it is with Abe and Heather. I asked Hubs how that happened for him and Abe. He admired Abe's commitment to God, to his unconditional love for his wife, and who are we kidding...this is Hubs we are talking about...and his intelligence. Oooh when I met Heather I thought ohhhhh she is so like me, I want to be her friend. Well, she is like me...in a remote way I suppose. HA! But she is infamous for her, "Now, if I was a Farmer I would....but I am not a Farmer, so I will not..."

I remember our pastor in Virginia said more than once, "You pick two or three couples where you are committed to each other's marriages, and you walk with them your whole Christian life."

I looked up synonyms for walking, and here is what I found:

stride, stroll, trek, stagger, tiptoe, limp, hobble, hike, march, pace

See how many different ways there are to walk? They are all require action, though. We are committed to walking with Abe and Heather, like they have been committed to us.

Some of our walking has been carefree, and some has been emotional. We have walked with Abe and Heather. We have known births, we have known deaths, we have known stress, and we have known joy. But just as I didn't know what it felt like to hike Diamond Head pregnant, we have only an idea because we have chosen to walk with them.

Columbus Day weekend, Abe's parents were in a terrible car accident, miles from their hotel. We spent the last month praying for a miracle, praying for peace for their family, walking with them, even from 6,000 miles away. Veteran's Day, his mother was promoted to Glory, and is at Home with her Heavenly Father. Our hearts are heavy for their loss, but bittersweetly rejoice that she is no longer in pain and her soul is at peace.

I grew to know Carolyn as more than Abe's mom. She mentored me, and I grew in my marriage. She also helped me when I had trouble nursing. How we hurt for you, Abe and Heather. Know that we are walking with you.

Lessons from Around the FARM

I love lingering in the front yard with the boys. We spy on our planters, like a treasure hunt, and spot such diverse creatures. We started our planter hunts a couple of years ago. But now each time we discover something particular to Hawaii I hope they grasp these moments and commit them to memory. I do believe our move will happen.

A few days ago we found a green anole in a bird of paradise bush. If you look carefully you can see the turquoise around the eyes. Anoles change colors depending on their environment, humidity, or even mood. This anole remained green, cautiously aware of us. Anoles are good guys. Like geckos, they eat bugs, spiders, and other pesky animals.

Our birds of paradise blooms are so vibrant right now!

The next morning, Son1 and I sat in two different worlds on the covered open lanai. He assembled a train set on the ground while I read my Daily Bible in a chair. Falling rain was rhythmic and calm. The peacefulness was interrupted by a squawking raucous. I looked up and a few Red Vented Bulbuls intently called to one another. This is not my photo, but a good close up.

They spread themselves between the bamboo trees, the heart shaped elephant ears, and the apple banana trees. Their sound was so unique, I sat contently welcoming the distraction. I was intrigued by their croons. Without warning a Bulbul swooped down and landed squarely on my grass. Fast. It romped about, searching, searching, searching. It did not give up; it was relentless. Like a hammer, its beak spaded the grass. It hit hard, forcefully, with determination. Just as quickly as his head dove, it snapped back with a big, fat, juicy, and squirmy red earthworm clenched in its beak. It reminded me of a smaller version of a hawk preying on a field mouse. The prize came without warning. But it came. The bird flew back to its perch, and suddenly a different bird took a turn. Once again, I witnessed the same searching, the same hammering of grass, the same prize, and the same rapid flee to its perch. I was awed. I called Son1 over to come quietly. We watched another bird, all over again, search, search, search and then flee. I ran inside for my camera. I really wanted a "worm shot." But each time the bird clutched its worm, it escaped faster than I could snap a shot. I did manage a couple of shots of the bulbuls in their watch spots.

I don't think the birds ever doubted they would find worms. They found them each and every time they swooped. Maybe I give them too much credit. Maybe they were too dumb to doubt. Maybe my back yard lawn is infested with worms, and I don't know it. I doubt that, though.

I sat under the shelter of my covered lanai, watching the rain, watching the birds, holding Son1 in my lap. I whispered to him how God made worms so that the birds would have food. At that moment I remembered:

"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?" -Matthew 6:25-27

Minutes passed. Now the birds had moved on to another yard, and Son1 squirmed off my lap and returned to his trains. I walked back into the house and found Hubby, recounting the Birds and Worms event. I told him I felt a peace our houses are going to sell just like the birds found their worms. "It's gonna happen, just like that, BAM. Without warning. Just like those birds hopped and hopped, and then, without warning, BAM they found their worms."

When it's going to happen, neither of us know. God only knows. What we do know is that Hubby still has a job in Hawaii, and the Powers That Be are kindly allowing us to sell our house in Hawaii before we move to San Diego. We appreciate all of you that are praying, and all that have extended us words of encouragement. They mean more than you know, to both of us. It's fun to share with one another, "Hey...you know what so and so told me today?" Or, "so and so emailed me and said..."

There is only one other thing we know. When BAM it happens, we will pocket our "worms" and fly away!

Napkin and No Nos

Selling two homes in a soft market doesn't exactly breed quiet souls. It's a season in our lives, a season that one way or another is going to pass.

Our pastor just finished preaching a six week sermon series on Psalm 23. I was so inspired I wanted to memorize the Psalm completely, committed to memory for good. I memorized it (is it possible to forget something you memorized?) in the fourth grade. I still know the verses today, but I get them mixed up, and forget words here and there. Hubby and I are re-memorizing (he memorized it eons ago, too) it together. I don't commit to anything without Hubby. I like sharing a goal.

In Hubby's lunch I always include a napkin with a note. NO MORE PERSONAL LOVE NOTES until Psalm 23 is memorized. Can you make out my scratch? Here is what I wrote last night for today's lunch:
Do you like the "restores?" Those are Costco and Wal Mart for stores.

"The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He guides me on paths of righteousness for His name's sake..." These are the first three verses. I am adding a verse a day.

Ohh, and the dark spot on the napkin is a reflection of my shadow over the white napkin. It's clean! Memorizing truths might prevent us from filling up on these:In an absolute moment of stress, recently, two half gallons of our favorite ice creams grew legs and walked in our house. But they didn't come solo. Noooo. They held the door open for a bag of brownies that crawled in because they were the "good guys." They benefited a fundraiser. These desserts made a negligible difference in our weight loss. So far.

Leaning on Faith

Words cannot express how I am feeling. Shock and sadness just don't seem to be enough. A friend moved from Hawaii for her husband to start grad school at MIT. She has two little boys, the same ages as my own. They weren't planning on a third, but sure enough, she left Hawaii pregnant. She did not find out what she was having initially, hoping for a baby girl. When she arrived in Boston, her new doctors suggested an ultrasound, just to peek and check out baby's health. About four weeks ago, she found out she was carrying a little princess. She also knew the baby's health was questionable. She was born prematurely at 30 weeks, just 2 weeks ago. Things were shaky, but optimistic. Today baby girl had an EEG and an MRI done, only to find she will probably not make it through the week.

In my studies, this verse struck me just last week:

"The heart knows its own bitterness, and no stranger shares its joy." -Proverbs 14:10

I have no idea what JOY she knew these last months, pregnant, expecting a baby girl. I didn't know her heart's expectations. I cannot imagine her grief. As much as I can try, there is One who knows her grief so much more than any one else.

A cross reference to this verse is:

"She was deeply distressed and prayed to the LORD and wept bitterly." -1 Sam 1:10

Hannah was devestated over her infertility, yet she went to the only One that knew and understood her heart.

While I am consumed with the first day back to preschool and selling our home, my heart is broken for my friend. I am praying for her as I am busying about my own life, knowing that she is faced with planning a celebration service for her baby girl this week. I pray that she leans on the One that knows her grief because He first knew her JOY.

Lifting My Eyes

You're right. Usually this blog is about our Life in Paradise. The last two weeks have hardly been paradise, though. Four hours after arriving form Maui in Honolulu, we drove round trip from the port, to my house, to the airport. Four hours later, Hubby was ready to board a plane, and I was driving home with the kids.

Hubby spent some time with my folks last week. San Diego was his last stop on his three city trip. They heaped praises on him for being the leader of our home, for his role in our sons' lives, and for being my loving partner. They have no idea how much that meant to Hubby. It never gets old after ten almost years of marriage. More than anything they are so thrilled that someone loves me like they do. I would say that is a stretch for most in-laws. Maybe one day two mother in laws will say that about my sons. I tell you this all of this for ONE reason. Please don't read this post and misunderstand that I resent my husband for traveling. NO. This post has really nothing to do with him being gone. It's just harder to put out fires alone. So about my last two weeks...

I begged for help from more friends in the last two weeks than ever. And I detest asking for help.

Help! Hubby is out of town, can you share church nursery duty with me?

Help! Son1 jammed his bathroom door closed with an open bathroom drawer. The only way in is through the second story window, unless you can pry the door open! (The door got pryed open.)

Help! I want to be culturally correct. What is the Hawaiian custom for preschool graduation? (That is a whole other post!)

Help! I'm locked out of my house! Can you climb through the open bathroom window on the first floor? I'm too short! (She did.)

Help! Son2 threw up all night! Can you take Son1 to school for me? (Same person that climbed through my bathroom window.)

Help! I lost my purse. I possibly left it at church, and I need to unlock the building and the gate to get in. Can you watch my kids for a few minutes? (Two friends and a held over babysitter helped, including the person that pryed open the bathroom door, and confirmed it took a genius to get the door jammed in such a way.)

Help! Can you watch my sick (but no longer vomiting) Son2 so I can attend a school function for Son1? (I asked more than one person.)

And I kept thinking to myself...it's just not as bad as when Son1 had Rotovirus and it came out both ends for seven days and Hubby was traveling. A fleeting thought...

This is how many animals got puked on by two children. They are drying after a washing machine cycle.

Then there were the mishaps.

My van door jammed shut one day. The power function went out. Crouched over, I carried Son2,from one side of the van to the other to get him in and out, for nearly two weeks. Between two ill children, I didn't make it to the dealership to get the door fixed.

Ghosts and monsters conveniently appeared in Son1's room at bedtime (taking me nearly 2 hours to get him down because he kept getting up) and again in the wee hours of the morning. They showed up every night, starting the night Hubby left. I was sleep deprived.

Son2 developed a sinus infection after his puking, requiring antibiotics and a wait at the pharmacy.

One of my kid's treated me to a traumatic trip to the ER. But I couldn't see asking for help, because hadn't I already over-asked everyone? I couldn't find my cell, so I used my house phone to dial my cell phone. Wait! I dialed another number than mine. I hung up on half a ring. Well, that was the phone call that saved my sanity. She called back. I explained what happened. She had been a fleeting thought through my mind as I was dialing my cell, and I dialed her instead. Well all the glory goes to God on my misdial because the short of the long story is her mother met me at the hospital and took the other child, his car seat, and his stuff to her house. The incident could have been it's own blog post, but just know that everyone is fine, and I am too exhausted to tell you.

I braved grocery shopping with the sick kids because we were out of milk. I came home in the dark and in the rain, with tired, sick, and crying children. I unloaded the groceries and the kids. I forgot the milk in the car overnight. I wanted to scream. It's over $5 a gallon at Costco and $8.29 if I have to get it at a regular grocery store. So I thought I would just buy another gallon the next day while we waited for my safety inspection that was due LAST MONTH. In Hawaii safety inspection stickers are displayed on rear bumpers, so I was a mobile billboard for non-compliance, and in danger of a ticket and a fine.

The safety inspector failed me for a chip in my windshield that I had filled in 2003 or 2004. The guy that checked me in at the car store called me ten minutes after I left. Didn't he say it was going to be 45 minutes? I would not have moved from the store for a ten minute wait. I had just crossed a busy street with fussy Son2 in his stroller, and a death grip on squirmy Son1. I stood at a grocery store rationalizing why it was OK to pay $8.29 for a gallon of milk at this point in life when my phone rang. Let's just say the inspector was the straw, you know the straw, the one that made me just snap.

Oh and one more very important piece of information. In the midst of all of the drama, mishaps, asking tons of people for help, ER visit, and illness I chose to go on the South Beach Diet. Let me tell you I wasn't exactly craving protein or veggies right then. Oooh I would have died for a milkshake. Or a bowl of ice cream. Or a pizza, and I don't even love pizza. But I could have loved it at that moment.

"Let me get this straight," I said over wails from a preschooler pleading for a beverage. "Unless I produce a receipt for the filled crack in my windshield, I have to refill a FILLED crack in order to pass inspection?!?"

"Well, that's why I asked you if you had any chips in your windows that would cause you to fail inspection."

"And I said NO because my car passed inspection on the island with a FILLED crack in 2005, 2006, and 2007. I had that crack filled in Virginia. This never happened on the island!"

I was at my limit. He wasn't going to let up and neither was I. Wouldn't I like to just come back to the store and speak to the inspector? Boy, would I, even if it meant leaving the store without milk. More wails from my preschooler as I held his wrist and marched back across the busy road, to the store, past the open car bays, where I swore the mechanics were chuckling at me. I waited patiently for the inspector, and gave Son1 a firm warning to behave himself. Mommy was going to talk to a man and I was not happy. He needed to be very good while I talked to this man.

I was whisked out to my car, parked on the hot black asphalt with two thirsty children. Now remember, I live in the tropics, when I say HOT BLACK ASPHALT I mean steaming HOT. So the belligerent inspector told me all my other inspections had been illegal. And I looked at him and said you are a G**dy**r store, and the last place I had it done was a Go*dy**r store, are you saying your own company does illegal inspections? If they passed this car, YES. AAAAGGGGGHHHH!!! I thought. I took one dramatic pause, stared at him, and slowly let my next words come out for their full impact. "Do you have kids?" He nodded. He had two little ones, like mine. "Well, I completely know you don't care how I am feeling right now, but let me explain something to you. My husband is off island, and I just dragged my two thirsty children here for an overdue inspection. Do you think I would have done that if I thought my vehicle was going to fail inspection? I DON'T HAVE THE RECEIPT. It is in a landfill in Virginia somewhere. Are you telling me that now I am going to have to MAKE THESE KIDS WAIT and PAY to refill a filled crack and PAY for my inspection?!?" He knew I was not going to retreat. I was not going to leave. This was unacceptable. I was hungry. I was sleep deprived. "Well, I can let you speak to the other inspector, and we can see what he says." Now did he think I thought the other inspector was going to disagree with him? He agreed he would not. At this point, I didn't care. Sure, I wanted to share my frustration, all over again.

What transpired is too long to post. This is getting too long. The end of the sweet story is that the other inspector was the store manager. But I was too carb crazy and delirious from fatigue to notice his name tag. He took pity on me. He gave me my inspection sticker. He all but hugged me, but I just let him shake my hand, which is less common on the island. Hugs are more cultural. Oooh I just was so grateful.

But I am human, and quickly I forgot the positives of the two weeks. And I was tired. I was feeling over-extended. And at the end of my two weeks alone, I remember wondering when things would get better. No one was there to help. I pulled out of my culdesac onto my cross street, and my thoughts were interrupted at the stop sign. I had looked right; no traffic. I looked left, and breathed out in wonder. A peace came over me, and I knew I was not alone. I knew where my help would come from.

This is the second time I felt God, maybe, just maybe, made ME this rainbow. Nothing is impossible with Him. I made another right turn, toward the main drag, and saw the rainbow extend. Back at the cross street it hid behind the clouds. Now it was in full view. I drove higher up the hill to take a picture.

On the way down the hill, I saw an absolutely magnificent sunset, with rays blasting through the clouds. I thought to go back a couple blocks to my house, where I could park, and perhaps find an unobstructed view for a photo. But what I found was better.

The house on the left is mine.

I learned a lot from that rainbow. At first it was a fragmented yet beautiful arc. From higher up on the hill, it was a brilliant arc. And when I drove back to my home, I saw the brilliant arc in a very personal way. The rainbow was beautiful all three times, but depending on how I headed toward it, it's beauty was elevated.

My situation had not changed. I was still alone with my needy children and sprouting mishaps. And let's not forget attempting The South Beach Diet. But the response of my heart is what mattered. The truth is that He cares about my struggles whether it is just fighting the urge for a chocolate shake or fighting off the fear of monsters at 3a.m. And He doesn't say, well, R., you're situation isn't as bad as So and So's. So why should I put that on myself? There is One that won't fail me for help, if I just lift my eyes.

Psalm 121
I will lift up my eyes to the mountains;
From where shall my help come?
My help comes from the LORD,
Who made heaven and earth.
He will not allow your foot to slip;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel
Will neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD is your keeper;
The LORD is your shade on your right hand.
The sun will not smite you by day,
Nor the moon by night.
The LORD will protect you from all evil;
He will keep your soul.
The LORD will guard your going out and your coming in
From this time forth and forever.

Aloha, Heading to Maui on the Superferry!

Vehicles are stowed in the white area. The passenger deck is the light blue area pictured above.

This weekend we sailed on the Hawaii Superferry from our island of Oahu to the island of Maui. The three hour trip was far more relaxing than boarding a plane, even for a forty minute flight to Maui. We packed our car with luggage, stroller, beach gear, and Hubby's scuba equipment. My car was the Farmer family's fifth passenger. We left our home, drove onto the Superferry, and drove right off in Maui. What a relief to avoid the hassle of airport parking, security lines, x-ray machines, the elusive and limited $2 luggage cart, boarding the rental car shuttle, and installing the car seats all over again!!

We hit the vehicle entrance line at 4:40am. At the first stop, our car was inspected by using large mirrors and flashlights to make sure there wasn't anything illegal or dangerous underneath. You'll never guess what this lady is looking for under my hood. If you guess correctly post a comment and let me know. She is looking for seeds that may have fallen under my hood. Cross pollination of species between islands can compromise the environment. Certain species are specific to particular islands.

At the next inspection point, we rolled down our window and handed over our IDs and confirmation code. In return we received boarding passes. The last inspection point was a random vehicle and passenger check. We were not inspected, though! Finally, we were among the last cars to board just after 6am. So much for picking the right lane. It worked out in the end, since we were one of the first cars off the ferry.

Once aboard, we chose from three gargantuan passenger cabins. Hubby and Son2 settled into seats, and Son1 and I aimed toward the viewing decks. We caught the sun rising over Waikiki and Diamond Head. The sun was luminous over the water. It was breathtaking. The deck was very occupied yet hushed. Some people used tripods and multiple lenses with their cameras. Some couples stood linked arm in arm. Son1 stood with his shoulders between my fingers and whispered to me all that he observed.


Immediately it struck me how I yearned for him to remember this day, to remember the sun rising in the East over the ocean, and the beauty of the moment. I leaned down and asked him if he would remember today. In the quiet morning I recalled different Psalms praising the Creator, and offered my own silent praises. For a few instants we chatted about Who had made all that we were observing. After we passed the Oahu landmarks we went in to check on the rest of the fam. Hubby found us seats in front of one of the many flat screens mounted on the wall. But with so many kids on board, the boys wanted to follow the action at the Manta Cove, where all of the keiki were hanging out. This was a designated play area and movie area for kids.I had brought snacks, but we were sitting so close to one of the three dining areas, that we just couldn't resist. Hubby loves pork manapuas. A manapua is a meat filled cake, or steamed bun, that you might see on a Chinese dim sum cart. Manapua is the Hawaiian word for this Chinese bun. These buns were introduced by the Chinese when they were brought to Hawaii as plantation workers. In Hawaii they are filled with different fillings. (Around Thanksgiving they are even pumpkin filled!)
Son2 loves bananas. They sold fresh fruit, but not bananas. So the cashier insisted she had one in her lunch, stowed in the employee area. She offered it to Hubby and Son2 and refused to take any money for it. Hubby slipped some money in the tip jar anyway. But that's what you can expect from local folks, much aloha. It would have been rude not to take it.Now this was the absolute crown jewel of the menu, the kalua pork nachos. These were the most delicious nachos Hubby and I had ever eaten. Kalua pork is salted and slow smoked. The nachos were also topped with pineapple chunks but they are hard to see in the picture.

We chose seats near a door that led to the decks. We rotated children, and took turns on the outdoor lanais. The Maui coastline came into view. The coast rose out of the ocean and seemed to touch the sky.


We were here! Within a few minutes all passengers with vehicles were called to the lower decks, even though we were still sailing on the water. We grabbed our stuff and grabbed our kids. It was a little tough to get to our car. The cars on the Superferry are jammed closely together. There are no parking stalls, and the cars are parked so tight! I couldn't get in on my side of the car. I couldn't fit between the cars to get to my door. There is only about 6 inches between these cars, from my rear bumper, to his door. It looks wider in the picture, though, because we held the camera above our heads to take the picture. I climbed through the opposite side to my seat.

Being the last to load had it's advantages. We were one of the first cars off the ferry, and onto Maui!

Moments from the Mommy Memory

Moments I hope I never forget...the moments I want to remember when I am frustrated with Son1, when we are at odds, and when I need to extend him grace he will not merit, because I too have been extended grace by my Heavenly Father....

Moments from Sunday...

Son1 with one of his Sunday School teachers, also our babysitter

Sunday night, Son1 extended his arms like he was flying an airplane and then drooped his head.

Me: What are you doing?
Him: I'm making a cross like Jesus! Jesus lives in heaven now with God, and He is the King!!

I tucked him into bed.
Me: It's time for you to go night night, and I need to make your lunch for your field trip tomorrow.
Him: (Peeking his shiny black three year old eyes out of his covers, wearing an ear to ear grin) Will you write me a note in my lunch, Mommy?

Awwww.....time is going so fast! Remember I love you in the coming years, even when you don't ask me to write you notes in your lunch anymore.

The Easter Message Retold by Son1

See the cave? It's empty.
Jesus is not there.
See the cross? It's still in the dirt.
Jesus is not there.
He died for my sins.
He lives in heaven now!
Jesus is the King!

And it is so precious to hear his voice tell it like this. We have been working on the Easter story for a few days, but this is how he summed it up.

Lesson From My Three Year Old in Church

Son1 started attending church nursery at 5 months. I was relieved that he was well cared for and we could attend the service without baby noise. Our church in VA had a great nursery with plenty of volunteers and staff. Then we moved to Hawaii where he continued attending nursery. Our current church has a 0 to 3 nursery during the service, and a preschool Sunday School class the other hour. Up until recently, he attended both.

Hubby and I started transitioning Son1 to the adult service about 1 month ago. We expected Son1 to stay with us through worship time, participate in the children's sermon, and then return to the 0 to 3 nursery during the big people sermon. We felt encouraged that he might be ready for the 4 to 6 class during service, even though he won't turn 4 until August. Last week Hubby tried the 4 to 6 class with Son1. He just didn't feel Son1 was ready for the class, but knew the 0 to 3 nursery wasn't the right place for him anymore, either. Since we are in between stages, we decided to keep Son1 in the service with us. He loves to watch all of the instruments, see his Sunday School teacher sing, watch the power point slides, and point to people he knows. He understands that his money he places in the offering plate goes to Jesus. But his favorite part is the children's sermon. It's Hubby's favorite part of the service, too.

Our church in Hawaii is great and allows each individual family to decide where their kids should be during service. Childcare is available, or you can choose to keep your children in service. The church provides gallon sized ziplock bags full of crayons, markers, stencils, and note pads for each child that chooses to stay in the service. Now, I never thought I would be one of those moms that keeps all my children in the service with me, but it works for now. Son2 will be 1 this Friday, and I have never left him in the nursery. He has had several sinus and ear infections, and I don't see the need to expose him to other children when he is recovering from being ill, or possibly contagious. The weeks he is well, I don't place him in the nursery, fearing he may catch something from another child. In Hawaii many families keep their children with them in the church service their first year of life, anyway.

I was somewhat worried that I was teaching Son1 that we just draw in church. Then, just before the sermon the pastor asked that we turn in our Bibles to the book of Matthew for the scripture reading. I am lazy and just read it where it is printed on the back of my church bulletin. Son1 was busy tracing the lines on a tic tac toe grid. He didn't even look up, but a few seconds later, he said, "You open your Bible, Mommy!!" I stared down at him, still intently using his marker. Here we were, sitting in the back third of the church service, and he was absorbing far more than I expected. I am not too worried that he thinks we just draw in church anymore!

Raising a Modern Day Knight

This book is a must read for fathers of sons. It addresses authentic, noble biblical manhood, and mature masculinity. I liked the definition the author uses for a man.
"A man is someone who rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and expects a greater reward." -Robert Lewis

The pastor overseeing family ministries at our church in VA recommended this book. His sons were both teenagers at the time. I purchased the book for Hubby three years ago. He started it, but didn't get very far. When we recently took our vacation to the Big Island, I was pleasantly surprised he packed the book. I had been thinking about reading it, too. We both read it on the trip. Moms, you can glean a lot of information from this book, and can really support your husbands in raising your sons. But this book is addressed to fathers. The first two-thirds of the book are very foundational, and do not specifically delve into exact life lessons. The last third of the book is far more application based. The book is much better than I anticipated. What a unique and indescribable responsibility to raise sons!

Driveway Sharing

We had agreed I was taking Son1 to gymnastics this morning. After I put Son2 down for a nap, I looked over the upstairs railing. Hubby had the front door open, ready to take Son1 to gymnastics. I put up a little fuss, but he insisted. The front door closed. I never heard my car start, though. Hmmm....I dialed his cell phone. Had he left? No answer. Well, maybe he was waiting for my second protest, and he was still in the driveway. I ran down the stairs and made my way down the driveway. He was standing there, with two men in ties.

The three men looked up when they saw me, awkwardly. I had interrupted their conversation. Son1 was strapped in his seat. He was waiting patiently, but there was a visual lesson he was learning about who his dad is and whom he serves. "Ohh," I stammered. "I was wondering if you wanted me to take Son1." Hubby winked at me, and assured me he would take Son1 to gymnastics. I retreated to the house, as the two men reached out, and shook Hubby's hand. One said, "Thanks for the chat, my friend."

A minute later the house phone rang. The caller ID said it was Hubby on my cell phone. If he was going to sit at gymnastics, it was no wonder he took my phone. I am the one with internet access. He shared with me a bit about his conversation with these men.

Since we have moved to Hawaii we commonly have people who share from a few different religions come to our door. We have made a practice to stop and talk to these people, with somewhat of an agenda:

1. We give them our time. These folks are out sharing with many people. When they are talking to us, it is our belief that they are not spending time misleading others. These visitors, or more importantly, these guests, understand that we genuinely want to hear what they believe, and have the time to understand where they are coming from.
2. Our hearts are softened toward them. We are saddened that they do not have an assurance of salvation. We believe the only way to heaven is through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. All those that have knocked on our door, sharing of their faith, have believed that we must earn our salvation, and that God has not extended this invitation to everyone. We have been told we must be careful, because only 144,00 will ever be saved, or we may not achieve the highest terrestrial level of heaven.
3. We offer to pray for them. We genuinely do care about them, and their souls.
4. We share out of obedience. Jesus commands us to in the Bible. It is not out of any type of super ego or personal gain. It is not because we want to argue or have the upper hand in any discussion. We share because we love Jesus.

We have met so many interesting folks. Some have come back to chat, and brought others from their congregation. Only a couple have gotten angry. Most of these guests we meet once, and we have no idea if we will ever meet them again. And that is a risk we take. We have no idea how God will choose to use us.

Hau'oli Makahiki Hou OR Happy New Year!

Our New Year's Resolutions-

Hubby:
1. Read through the Bible, Genesis to Revelation, in 2008
2. Finish PhD
3. Lose weight

Me:
1. Read through the Bible, Genesis to Revelation, in 2008.
2. Take a sewing class
3. Make a practice of saying NO to others more often rather than trying to cram too much in. Saying NO to others means I am saying YES to my husband and kids more often.

Hau'oli Makahiki Hou means Happy New Year in Hawaiian. The western Christmas and New Year fell during this same time of the year that the Hawaiians traditionally honored the earth for giving them plenty to eat. This period of resting and feasting was called Makahiki. It lasted for 4 months, and no wars or conflicts were allowed during this time. Because makahiki also means "year", the Hawaiian phrase for "Happy New Year" became "Hau'oli (happy) Makahiki (year) Hou (new)"(how-OH-lee mah-kah-hee-kee ho). http://gohawaii.about.com/od/festivals/a/hawaii_xmas_a.htm

Christmas Eve Service

This is the first year Son1 held a candle during the Christmas Eve service. He was taken with the hand bell choir, the Christmas nativity, and the carols.

Birthday Party for Jesus

We really wanted Son1 to understand the granduer of the Christmas season, that Jesus Christ was born, and that is why we celebrate. We planned a birthday party for Jesus. Our plan included a reinactment of the Christmas story, a nativity craft, and some play time. With the characters arriving at different times (understandable with the business of the Christmas season) we passed on the reinactment of the Christmas story. We had some pizza and made our nativity craft, though. Everyone got a chance to bounce in the bounce house, though. We would like to make the party an annual tradition.

Walk Through Bethlehem

We took Son1 and Son2 on a Walk Through Bethlehem, hosted by a local church. When we first arrived we were greeted by Roman guards. We had to go and register our family name at the census, in Bethlehem. These guards were gentle. They offered Son1 their shield to hold.Once we registered our family name, we were seranaded by some town musicians, while we waited for our guide.

Since Bethlehem was under Ceasar's rule, we were stopped by guards and questioned to make sure we had registered our family name. We had to pass through this area of blind beggars, and homeless people, before we could get to the marketplace. I was glad Son1 wasn't frightened because it was very realistic. Hubby's favorite part was the guy that was stowed under the sewer grate and was throwing his hands up through the grate. Yuck. After we went through the beggar alley, we finally arrived at the marketplace. Zacheus made sure we had paid our taxes. The marketplace was well set up for the tour of Bethlehem. It looked like a real farmer's market (no relation to us, ha ha). Here Son1 is checking out the pommegranates and grapes. He sampled a lot of stuff at the marketplae. One vendor offered me some dates. "Ohhhh, I have never had dates." So the vendor looked at me curiously and said, "Oh, I am sure you have. Isn't that your husband?" Ha ha. That is some Bethlehem humor for you.

These women at the well are gossipping about Mary, the mother of Jesus. Son1 was really interested in this angel's wings by this point. And just for extra measure to make we were watching, she continually flapped them, just because she could. Yeah...that totally enthralled Son1.

We continued through and watched some rabbinical teaching in a boys' school and found the inn keeper counting money.

He encouraged us to go out to the stable and find Mary, Joseph and Jesus. But along the way we encountered shephers quaking at the sight.....and see this chorus of angels...singing Alleluia.

Soon after we found Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus, and the magi, in the last scene. It was raining, and it was way past Son2's bed time, so we wandered a little past the food table and rather quickly went home. The cast did a great job, though. It was a thorough 11 scenes

A Preschool Thanksgiving

Son1 had a Thanksgiving luncheon at preschool. First we created a Thanksgiving windsock with Son1 for craft time. Then each family placed a feather on this large turkey with their thanksgivings. Ohhh Hubby volunteered to fill out our feather with a twinkle in his eye, like he was going to take an evangelical opportunity. I suggested um, not now. I love Jesus, I do. I invited his teachers to our church for a Christmas outreach event. I am most comfortable, and often do share my faith in smaller settings. I just didn't want the plan of salvation on a turkey feather at that moment. Shoot me, save the turkey, true confessions of a born again that is sometimes reluctant to share Jesus. My husband generally doesn't have that issue. It must be very freeing and I ought to take some lessons. I took one look at that yellow feather, and I thought I recognized the handwriting. "I thank God for...His Son, Jesus Christ, my family, and His many Blessings!...." I stopped reading, went up to Hubby, and said I wish he wouldn't have written that. He gave me a perplexed look. Stomach turn. I went back to finish reading the rest of the yellow feather that thanked the families....and on and on.....the teacher had written the feather! Boy I was embarrassed of myself for my shyness and proud of her all at the same time. Lesson learned. Then I looked for very similar writing on the blue feather that thanks God for our preschool teachers, and our family, and la la la that Hubby wrote.

Before we ate, his preschool teacher asked for a moment of silence where we remembered our forefathers and why they came to this country (uh hem, religious freedom that she all but mentioned), asked us to bow our heads, and then concluded us with AMEN. That is otherwise known as a prayer to me. And I'm so cool with that, particularly outside of a Christian environment. There is no way I would have gotten away with doing the same, teaching in conservative VA, where there is a daily moment of silence in the public schools.

All of the families participated in creating a knock down luncheon buffet. There was local food, fruit, pizza, hot dogs, salads, breads, desserts...and a ton of other stuff I can't remember.

This is our family photo with Roaring Lion. That is his Natvie American name for the Thanksgiving play.