San Luis Obispo to Oxnard

We said our goodbyes in San Luis, and for three hours, our family of four was alone, once again on the road. We jumped on the 101 South, toward Ventura County. We drove through Central California, the heart of West Coast agriculture. Along the 101 South, between San Luis Obispo County and Santa Barbara are miles and miles of grape vineyards.
The highway winds between rolling hills of various crops, and then in an instant hooks at the edge of the California coast. It switches back and forth between country and coast like this for miles and miles.

Just outside of Santa Barbara we passed Santa Claus Lane, in the beach town of Carpinteria. There used to be a humongous Santa Claus there with an entire village with shops and restaurants. Most everything was removed and renovated in the last few years. A giant Santa once waved from the 101 exit. Some people in Oxnard rescued the Santa from demolition, and moved him there. He once sat on the 101 South for over 50 years.

South of Santa Barbara, and north of Los Angeles, we came into Ventura County, where Hubby and I lived our first two years of marriage. Our first home was off Seaward Avenue. But rather than turn left at this intersection, we turned right. If you are from California, you know why we took a detour.

In N Out Burger was the very first drive through hamburger stand in California back in 1948. The company is privately and family owned, and will never ever franchise. There are well over 150 In N Out locations. The menu has been nearly the same for 60 years. All of the shakes are made with real ice cream, the burgers never hit the grill until they are ordered, and the buns are made from old fashioned slow rising sponge dough. The french fries are fried in cholesterol free vegetable oil, and are hand cut in front of the customers. Anybody that leaves California and comes back knows to stop here. There is a not so secret menu passed by word of mouth by Californians, to order custom burgers. The associates are trained on the secret menu, but it is not published at the restaurant. In N Out has expanded a bit into Nevada and Arizona, too.
I had been trying to take a picture of the California mission bells that lined the coast from the car, but I just wasn't fast enough. Sitting in the In N Out drive through, I spotted one along the 101.
There are 150 bells along the 600 mile historic El Camino Real. In Spanish it means The Royal Road, and is also known as The King's Highway. This 600 mile stretch is the California Mission Trail, connecting the 21 missions commissioned by the King Carlos III of Spain. Before they were vandalized, there were once 450 bells. Since road signs were sparse in the early part of the last century, these bells were placed as landmarks all along the coast of California, to mark the mission trail. They are shaped like a shepherd's crook, or Franciscan walking stick.

Our food was ready. Hubby paid for our food, and we headed down Seaward Avenue, toward our very first three story townhouse, two blocks from the beach, on Oxnard Shores. Farther down the road we turned into Channel Islands Harbor to our hotel. We lugged all of our stuff from the car, into our room, and unpacked our In N Out dinner.
The boys shared this cheeseburger. These are the famous sponge dough buns. We ordered the burger from the secret word of mouth menu, "Animal Style." That means it is a mustard cooked beef patty, extra pickle, extra spread, and grilled onions.

We really should have deviated from the diet for this, but we didn't. Also on the secret menu is a "Protein Style." This means the burger is without bread, wrapped in hand leafed lettuce. Hubby ordered his burger, Protein Style, Animal Style, with "Double Meat." Yeah, that means just what it says, two patties When you order anything off the secret menu, they don't charge extra, even for double meat!!

Our kids shared the french fries, and it killed us to pass on these fries.

This was Son2's first In N Out experience, and he just scarfed all of his food! The boys shared the chocolate shake made with real chocolate ice cream while we just stared and salivated.

After sleeping on air mattresses the last several nights, we finally recharged with a great night's sleep. The suite had two bathrooms, so Son2 slept in a crib in one, while Son1 slept in the living room. It was so quiet, and we slept in with just a few minutes to spare for breakfast.

We checked out, and drove out to the last place we lived in California before we moved to Virginia, in Port Hueneme. We found our old house in the same condition we found it the first time. The vacant house was being painted, ready for the next tenant. Our teeny little beach house had three bedrooms, 1.5 baths, a living and dining room, a laundry room, and kitchen, and was all of 1,100 square feet. Again, this house was just a stone's throw from the beach, at the end of our road. At the traffic light we pulled into Port Hueneme, and Hubby showed Son1 his old work place.

Our last stop in Ventura County was in quaint Filmore. It is a small valley town just below the Los Padres National Forrest, and within the historic tree farming belt. There are many road side fruit stands as you come into the town. Hubby's cousins live here. They were such good friends during the first couple of years of marriage. His cousin R. is deploying to Iraq for 6 months at the end of June. They missed the family reunion, but we wanted to see them before he left. Their children were in my wedding.

I love their courtyard! They built this three years ago but we hadn't ever seen it, complete with morning glories, jasmine bushes, and creeping moss in between the stones. They were wonderful hosts and remembered our dinner favorites from years ago. Desserts were a whole course in themselves, too! We indulged and figured the diet could wait. Ha!

But best of all they blessed us with a humongous pirate ship to take to my parents in San Diego. It was once their son's from long ago. They kept it for children that came to visit well after their son had outgrown it. But since Son1 is deep in a pirate phase now, and they saw how much joy the ship brought him, they generously sent us off to San Diego with pirate figures aboard the large ship.

On Our Last Day with Family in San Luis Obispo

On our last morning together with Hubby's immediate family, we savored breakfast at the same place as the last few mornings, The Cowgirl Cafe. The food portions were monstrous! Hubby and I were able to stay on our diet with the Kitchen Sink omelet. Think of every imaginable vegetable used in an omelet, plus every kind of appropriate omelet meat, plus a full plate of biscuits and gravy that we both passed on, plus hash browns and toast. I passed on the hash browns and asked for extra vegetables. But man oh man were those portions unreal! Every morning the entire family happily hit old town Paso Robles for breakfast!


We returned to the house in Paso Robles, one last time together. Our branch of the family looks forward to the family reunion all year long. We stay up late and wake up too early. It's like a high all weekend, and then the last morning always is a bit quieter. Maybe we are tired, maybe we are sad, and maybe it's a bit of both. It is the one time of year my mother in law comes in from Arizona, and is together with her son in Washington, and her son in Hawaii at the same time, in the same state. It is the one time of year my son knows what it means to be a nephew and play with cousins. And since the Farmer brothers have lost two siblings, we all recognize just how precious it is to be with family. Living apart from any immediate family hurts the most when you have to say goodbye.


Uncle T. bought each of my boys some small toys that we can take back to Hawaii with us. He bought Son1 a little airplane and a little helicopter. Those two little toys went with us to restaurants, to sleep, and to the family reunion events. He kept saying they were special because they were from his Uncle T. Somehow this little comment was enough to give us all the warm and fuzzies. Soon enough, Uncle T. and Aunt M. drove three hours before boarding a plane and flying back to Washington. Son1 ran out for one last goodbye, with his special toys.

My mother in law had ideas for the rest of our day. She wanted to spend some special time with her only two grandchildren. Aunt N. invited us all to her timeshare pool at Avila Beach. The day was so beautiful since the heat finally broke! We filled up in San Luis, where gas was over $4.50 a gallon. Our total was over $62 for 13 gallons of gas. Ouch!

Son1 claimed his little brother's float when he skipped on the opportunity to use it. Son1 pretended he was sailing a boat, while his baby brother floated a toy boat. Soon enough Son1 tired of the floatie, and jumped into the deep end of the pool from the deck, over and over. Meantime Son2 objected loudly at being held in a pool. GG (great-grandma) hoisted him up on the deck, and in a split second, he copied his brother, and tried to jump in the pool! No one could believe our little 14 month old quickly picked up his brother's pool antics! No, we were not concerned he would drown. Hubby and I learned to swim as infants ourselves. Plus, there were too many adults crowded right in front of him. Truth be told he hardly hit the water, because too many of us caught him at once..

A few other relatives met us at the pool. Just because we couldn't get enough of ourselves, we headed out to dinner one last time together. While we waited, Son2 chomped down on an appetizer. Everyone got a big kick out of one of the youngest members of our extended family.

Hoedown in Templeton

The last official family reunion event was the Hoedown in Templeton. Aunt N. lives in Templeton, off of Vineyard, on the way to the wine country. Folks in San Luis Obispo County pride themselves on country living, so a hoedown was completely appropriate. Aunt N. made her homemade chili, sweet cornbread, and apple crisp. It was, of course, all organic, because organic is her middle name. And it was delicious.

Line dancing teachers were hired for two hours. Family across generations danced and danced. Others gabbed and just watched. Son2 fell asleep so early, he missed the whole thing!

Son1 and these cousins were all born the same year, and are all the first grandchildren of my mother in law, Aunt N., and Aunt I.

Aunt N. built a play structure in her backyard for her grandson. Son1 loved the swings!! We don't have public parks on Oahu with swings.

Uncle T. took Son1 on a little walk to the neighbor's yard. They peeked at the neighbor's horses through a fence. Son1 was fascinated that so many horses were found in people's backyards. This was a special treat to see them so close. Horses in backyards in Hawaii hardly exist!

Uncle T. and Aunt M. trying to keep cool in the early evening.

Aunt N. rested her foot a bit, after all of the cooking and dancing. She broke a bone, and had her cast removed a few days before the reunion. Her well deserved rest allowed for some time with Hubby. She tells everyone Hubby is like her brother, since they grew up in the same home for awhile, and she is only 11 years older.

The kids didn't tire from dancing. Son1 danced in between his relatives, encouraging them to imitate his signature moves. Hubby jumped in on the action. It was too funny!! They danced and kicked up their heels right until it was time for us to call it a night, a very, very late night.

Family Reunion Weekend

We canceled the vacation home we rented when Aunt N. generously offered to let the Farmer Family stay at the spec home her husband built. He is a home builder, and just finished this 5200 square foot home in Paso Robles. The property was large enough to ride motorcycles. A cousin just purchased this motorcycle, and Hubby took it for a little spin.

The home was spacious and unfurnished, so we resorted to indoor camping on air mattresses. Our family arrived from Hawaii, Uncle T. and Aunt M. arrived from Washington, and Grandma T. drove in from Arizona.

The kids were incredibly comfortable, stretching sheets into forts, and playing motor boat with a swim floatie. They started up an indoor dodge ball game, hide and seek, and endlessly played with their trains. The neighbors own horses, and the kids would sit on the deck and hope to catch a glimpse of Honey, the horse. Cousin V. lives less than five minutes from this house, so he and his parents joined us in the evenings. Uncle T., Aunt M., and Grandma T. acted just like big kids, in the fort, playing games, and supervising gymnastics moves. The kids were content to forget about all of the big people, too, and the house was large enough that they could roam freely. It was SO HOT the first few days were there. It was uncharacteristically 112 degrees. The air conditioning breaker broke and was replaced, and we set off eight ant bombs to cure that problem! We arrived late at the traditional Saturday family reunion picnic after a morning of fixing things. We were just in time for the family news announcements, the traditional photo, and family business. It was just too hot to be outside, so the picnic was over rather quickly. Most of the family headed for the beach, but the Farmers, my sister and son, and some of the Chathams came back to the house in Paso Robles. The guys broke out into a poker game, and the girls put the overtired little boys to bed, and jabbered, and jabbered, and jabbered.

Hubby, his grandma, and brother at the family reunion picnic

Sunday we toured Old Town San Luis Obispo. Son1 found these benches in an atrium. "X marks the spot! X marks the spot!" he called. He is really into pirates, and pirate ships.

At the heart of Old Town San Luis Obispo is Mission San Luis Obispo de Tolosa. The mission was founded in 1772 by Father Junipero Serra. Since Aunt M. did not grow up in California, I shared a little bit of mission history with her. The King Carols III of Spain wanted to gain a foothold in the New World in an area called Alta California. The political reasons were to beat the Russians before they moved south. The religious reasons for establishing the missions were to colonize and Christianize the indigenous people of California. When this mission was established in San Luis, the Chumash tribe resided here. New converts were brought to the mission to live, work, and learn about Christianity. This mission is the fifth of 21 established missions along the California coast. All of the missions were designed to be one day's walk from one to the next, along the ocean, on a trail called El Camino Real. These historic churches still operate traditional Catholic masses today, and are church parishes, in addition to historic landmarks. Mission San Luis Obispo is unique in that it is the only California mission that was both a belfry and vestibule. It is an L shaped church.

Father Junipero Serra, outside of the belfryThe beams are exposed and made of wood

Detail of the mission walls

All of the California missions raised agriculture, and all raised vineyards. These grapevines covered an arbor in the mission plaza, or center court.

Uncle T., the boys, and Hubby are sitting under the three mission bells called Sorrow, Gloria, and Joy. Bells were important to all of the California missions because they signaled different daily mission events depending on the way they were rung. The ringing of the bells is a special event even today.

The missions have been restored. These are smaller versions of several bells that still mark the El Camino Real to this day. They decorated the garden at the San Luis mission.

In the mission plaza, Aunt M. helped the boys make wishes in the wishing well.
Today the mission serves as a community backdrop for gardens, fountains, and shops. The California flag flies high in the center court. The California flag displays the California Grizzly Bear that is now extinct.

The kids were most fascinated by the fountain with the Chumash girl and Grizzly Bear. They pet him and hugged him, and splashed in the water. It was still so hot!The heat and sun were beating down on us, and Uncle T. suggested ice cream. Son1 snatched a piggy back ride down the historic streets.

Son1 and Aunt M.

I stressed the whole way to the ice cream shop. It was hot. I was going to melt, and I really wanted an ice cream. I really didn't want to blow my diet, though. I was so worried Hubby and I were going to cave, until my eyes feasted on this:

After a long wait because the young lady running the cash register couldn't re-roll the register tape, we were all served our treats. She never did figure it out, and wrote down our total on the back of an envelope, along with about ten other customers. My sister volunteered me to help her, but I had not rolled register tape in several years, since working at Sea World in San Diego.

The whole gang sat outside in the courtyard, with a view to the San Luis Creek and the mission gardens. The kids had their roam of the courtyard, and their fill of sweet treats.

All too soon it was time to bid my sister and her son goodbye. They were returning to Los Angeles since she worked Monday. It was such a rarity and such a blessing that the boys were able to play together. I know Son1 understands the importance of family, and goodbye was bittersweet.

Avila Beach Bonfire

The morning after our eventful plane ride we headed North on the 405 freeway. I squinted my eyes, flipped open my cell, and dialed my sis. She already knew why I was calling. I didn't even have to say it. "I know, I know. You had to show up on the smoggiest, hottest, day of the year. Honestly, it's never like this." Right. It was so bad! The 40 mile drive to her house took us an hour and a half in traffic. Once we hit the UCLA area, and I could see the sign for Sunset Blvd, memories started to flood back. I hadn't driven this direction in nearly eight years, when I left California for Virginia. Even then, I hadn't lived in this area in ten years. "Look, look! This is where Mommy first met Daddy!" But Son1 was truly unphased by my excitement. How I loved date nights in Santa Monica and Westwood when we first met twelve years ago! The 405 wound past Mulholland Drive, where we attended church in Bel Air, and into the San Fernando Valley, where I had my first teaching job. "What was that radio station we used to love when we lived here?" Hubby asked. We tuned in, and traveled north. As we left the metropolitan area, out to my sister's house, I laughed. I used to drive this longer route to my house in Ventura County because I loved these mountains. They're hard to see, but they are really brown. I was so surprised!

Eventually the 405 became the 5 North. We pulled off at the foot of the San Gabriel Mountains, to my sister’s exit. We sat in her driveway as the garage door rolled open and my sister and nephew greeted us. It’s amazing how much they have changed in a year’s time! She, twenty pounds lighter and more confident, and he, taller and thinner, looking more and more like my own children. We scrambled around the house to load the car, grabbed a bite to eat, and let the kids explore. Within minutes we were back in the car, heading north on the 5 freeway. My sister and her son were joining us for the 40th Annual Bellenbaum Reunion, for Hubby's family. This year it was held in San Luis Obispo County. Up the California Grapevine, and then down, we switched onto the 166 West, destination, San Luis Obispo County. Round and round we twisted and turned on the 166. We turned and turned, and stopped and stopped. Sometimes the kids were truthful and had to go potty, and sometimes they were not, and we stopped anyway. Son2 was overtired and overly loud. Would the ride ever end?!? It did! The 166 West ended at the 101 North in San Luis Obispo County. Not too much longer we turned off onto the Avila Beach Road exit, and arrived at the welcome bonfire.

Avila Beach is short and sheltered in San Luis Bay. It faces south and is protected by Point San Luis. This is why it was so warm.

"I see Grandma, I see Grandma!" called Son1. I turned my head, and there she was, walking down the boat ramp, toward the bonfire pits. Hubby rolled down his window, and called out to his mother. The doors of our rented van flew open, and the kids clamored out, down the boat ramp. We said our hellos, gave hugs, and joined the party.

Son1 and my sister's little boy

A bonfire was already burning. We helped the kids spear hot dogs and cook them over the fire.

Son2 ate hot dogs, and then some!

Before we had even piled out of the car, Hubby and I had a little talk with Son1. Hubby wasn't going to get in the water, I wasn't going to get in the water, and neither was he!! We told him the water was so much colder than in Hawaii, and he would be miserable. We thought we had him going...but cousins will be cousins....

As the sun began to set over Avila Beach, Son1, his grandmother, and a string of cousins confidently approached the water. The tide reached the shore more intensely, though. A little wade turned out to be far more fun and far more wet.

Soon enough the cousins came out of the water for marshmallow roasting. The Bellenbaums are great about helping out all of the little kids. A big cousin helped Son1 spear his marshmallow, and toast it to perfection.

Together they assembled a s'more. It was his first, and he didn't love it. "Toss it into the fire!" a few people called. But someone begged to rescue it.

Sis scores his s'more

Evening fell, and the kids were far from tired. Grandma T. happily strolled her baby grandson along the seashore. I caught up with them, and a few others at just the right time. We spotted a seal right in front of us, just less than twenty yards from us, riding wave after wave. We called to the others at the bonfire, and several folks rushed to share our excitement.

The evening grew into nightfall. Son1 and his cousin (7 days younger) tried to copy a fort the older boys were building. They worked intently to make their house.

Then they wised up. They invaded the big boy fort and attempted homesteading!

The evening was warm, and full of reunion with those we hadn't seen in a year. The kids were not ready to leave, not one little bit. They were thrilled to play together again this year. I promised Son1 so much more fun over the weekend as we stomped off the sand. Well after 9pm Hubby and I collected our children and our things, and headed for some sleep.